I haven’t done a column about personalized license plates in probably a year or more. I’ve done these columns occasionally for the past 10 years, mainly because I find personal plates to sometimes be hilarious, but also because many readers enjoy them too.
So I’ve been keeping track over the last year and I have a few I’d like to offer, with commentary, if you’ll indulge me for a few minutes. Here they are:
EMTGURL — I’m going to take a guess here, but I think this plate likely belongs to someone, a female, who is serving somewhere as an Emergency Medical Technician. No brainer, right? I like plates that reflect something the driver is passionate about, or something that has to do with their profession. This one hits it right on the head.
ILLEGAL — Well, I don’t know if they’re talking about the car this plate belongs to, or if it’s the person. Either way, I don’t think it’s a good idea to drive down the road with a plate which either describes some aspect of you or your car as being in violation of the law. The plate should just say PULL ME OVER, OFFICER.
MOCATS — An obvious feline lover, perhaps? Maybe a future, or present, cat lady who just can’t have enough of the purring pets. Personally I’ve never been a huge cat lover. Too many of them climb on tables, bite or scratch you when you pet them or fail to use their litterbox when they have to do their business. But that’s just me, my plate would be NOCATS.
GGDOG — On the other side of the coin, there’s this personal license plate. This person prefers dogs, I’m going to guess. For a moment I thought this might be a good plate for me, since my initials are “GG” and I’m a dog lover. But the next plate is probably more up my alley.
I PRESS — Now this I can relate to. Since I am a member of “the press” I think this is the plate I should have on my car. I’ve also been known to “press” people’s buttons, so it could work for me from this standpoint as well.
SUPRSTZ — Not one, but two or more “superstars” may drive or ride in this vehicle. I’m not sure, but I’ll bet the “diva” level gets laid on heavy when these folks go for a Sunday drive. Makes me think of the scene from the comedy “Step Brothers” where the family sings “Oh Sweet Child of Mine” in the minivan as they drive to Sunday dinner.
NOW — Someone who is impatient. Probably also applicable to me, since I’ve been told I have no patience. I’m going to keep this one in mind, assuming its ever available at the Secretary of State’s office.
JIGGSAW — The last, and possibly the most unusual of these vanity plates. It was on the back of a white Chevrolet Colorado with a picture of the character Jigsaw from the Saw horror movies on the back window. Apparently a fan of the gruesome horror films who finds the evil little puppet who rides around on a tricycle to be swell enough to plaster on their truck window. Just be afraid if they pull up next to you and shout from the window, “Do you want to play a game?”
Gary Gould is the managing editor of the View Newspapers and Davison Index. Contact him at 810-452-2650 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.